To live or to die....

[zallia]

Tomorrow I find out if I'm hired at Hastings. I still have that sick feeling in my stomache. In a way I hope the call never comes. I just don't want to deal with what comes after. I sometimes feel like killing myself just so I won't have to deal with all these thoughts and feelings. The weekend was good in that it provided a distraction from everything, but of course I managed to fuck that up too by acting like an asshole. I forget how badly I deal with stress around people and how I lash out. What can I say, I'm a fuck-up and I always will be. That guy probably knows it and if he's smart won't hire me.

Comments

[serisun.livejournal.com]

Ah stupid Robby making us feel bad.
I suppose we were out of hand. But still.
Big ol' guilt trip in the middle of a fun swimming time.

But don't worry, the stress will pass and work is way easier then school. I'm sure you'll be a great Hastings worker. And during those times you do mess up.. just give him my name when he asks for yours, lol.

[zallia.livejournal.com]

He reads my LJ just in case you want to edit that. *^^

[kuraibanin.livejournal.com]

Hey, don't be so hard on yourself. I think you're a wonderful person, I just wish sometimes you could see yourself the way I see you. Hang in there and try not to stress too much!!

-Tatton